Chicken Soup for the Anxious Soul

Tonight I am staying in and making my favorite chicken and rice soup.  Very simple; carrots, celery, can of tomatoes, chicken, thyme, and 6 cups of homemade chicken stock straight from my freezer.  So easy, so good, so healing.  I am a little under the weather.  I think it is due to stress.  I must say that I rarely get sick and when I do, it is usually only for a few days and absolutely tolerable thanks to my kick ass immune system.  I owe that to all the raw milk and homemade chicken stock I eat 🙂  no, seriously…that stuff is magical.  Look it up.  I also haven’t been sleeping very well lately.  I suffer from mild anxiety.  Well I call it mild because I don’t want to alarm myself, and I am also self diagnosed.  I don’t know what else you would call it if it isn’t that.  Over the last week I have been preparing my records for the tax prepareres and working overtime babysitting.  It is the last week of my 101 class at UCB and tomorrow we have our class show.  That, my friends, is the catalyst of the recent decline in my health.  I am nervous, and when I get nervous I have dreams.  Lots of dreams.  Dreams of improv scenes going awry, dreams of improv teams at UCB, dreams of specific improv actors at UCB who I happen to hold in high regard.  Over and over these images come to me and I toss and turn all night.  Dont get me wrong, I love my improv class.  I feel more comfortable now than I did on the first day, and I have accomplished something that I thought I never would.  Prior to this I have never taken an improv class or workshop in my entire life.  In fact, I deliberately avoided them like I do hydrogenated oils and high fructose corn syrup.  (For those of you who do not know, I avoid these things at all costs.  They are terrible for you, and unfortunately are found in almost everything you buy in the supermarket, along with a plethora of other ingredients that you can’t pronounce.  Don’t believe me, go ahead, see for yourself…)  During class I repeatedly made myself volunteer and go first for many exercises.  This was terrifying, but needed to be done.  Now, at the end of the 8 weeks I feel confident enough to take the stage.  There is just one catch…you are not invited.  Sorry.  I won’t be moved.  To get up there in the first place is such a huge step for me, that I don’t need the added pressure of knowing people are coming to see me “perform” improv.  I don’t feel like I am “performing” improv yet.  I feel more like I am simply “stumbling through” improv, so I see this as rehearsal, and you don’t get to come to rehearsal.  When 201 is over, I promise I’ll invite you all to that show.  Until then, I have to do this alone.  I’ll let you know how it goes…

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